Right now, Frankenberry is taking a practice A+ test online, and I'm trying to think of a blog topic. This happens often. I sit down with the intention to blog about something, and my mind goes completely blank. Clean slate; I've got nothing to talk about. I usually have to stare at this blank publishing box for a while before anything comes to mind.
I started writing a novel a few months back. After about a page worth of writing, I put the notebook away for the night, and I haven't touched it since. I had a good thing going with that story, and I will.
If I can get myself motivated to pick up the notebook and a pen.
But alas, my laziness increases every day. I wake up anywhere between 1:00 and 3:00 p.m. and check my Facebook. The rest of the day consists of staying in my pajamas, eating, and playing video games. I haven't even picked up a book in over a month.
I keep telling myself that once I move out, things will be different. I'll feel much more free, and I'll be more comfortable in working on things that cater to my wants and needs. But will things really change?
Experience tells me no. How much more freedom do I need? I don't have a job, I have no bills, and I don't live with my parents. What motivator am I missing that will kickstart my rump into gear?
Whatever it is, I need to find it desperately fast.
What motivates you?
Tuesday, April 13, 2010
Tuesday, April 6, 2010
This is an obscure update.
I haven't blogged in a while. I'm a bad, bad person. I've accepted this.
Here's what I have been using to get my hands a little dirty as of late:
1. I am a stand-in bassist for the band Never Before Scene.
Add them here: MySpace and here: FaceBook
OOooh, shameless plug, go.
2. Fuck college. I fucking hate it.
3. I completely lack motivation right now. I want a job so badly, but I can hardly get out of bed after 14 hours of sleep. I don't know what the hell is wrong with me. Oh, I remember; I'm just fucking lazy.
4. I'm updating this out of duty. I feel like I have a commitment to adhere to. FUTURE BABIES COMMITMENT.
5. My love of video games has too much control over my free time. Fuck you, Grand Theft Auto 4. I can live without you. ... I'm so sorry, baby! Please take me back! Yessssss, my precious.....
WHATCHUUUU STARIN' AT?!
6. I have no idea what happened during #5.
7. 'Mambo Number Five' is now stuck in my head.
8. I need a working cell phone more than I need sleep.
9. NEW SEASON OF DOCTOR WHOOOOOOOO!!
10. It's 3:14 a.m. I won't be in bed for a few hours. Yes, I'm fucked.
11. America--FUCK YEAH!
12. The world is more positive when you're Scott Stapp. Yeah.
13. Damn it, I meant for this blog to be meaningful.
14. A little bit of Monica in my life; a little bit of Erica by my side....
15. Today, while eating shells&cheese, I wondered what I would do if I found a mouse foot in my food. I am now afraid of shells&cheese.
16. Siamese cats are the shit.
17. Speaking of Siamese shit and cats, I went to the circus not too long ago. It was awesome.
18. You're drunk.
19. Fuck this blog. I'm tired.
Here's what I have been using to get my hands a little dirty as of late:
1. I am a stand-in bassist for the band Never Before Scene.
Add them here: MySpace and here: FaceBook
OOooh, shameless plug, go.
2. Fuck college. I fucking hate it.
3. I completely lack motivation right now. I want a job so badly, but I can hardly get out of bed after 14 hours of sleep. I don't know what the hell is wrong with me. Oh, I remember; I'm just fucking lazy.
4. I'm updating this out of duty. I feel like I have a commitment to adhere to. FUTURE BABIES COMMITMENT.
5. My love of video games has too much control over my free time. Fuck you, Grand Theft Auto 4. I can live without you. ... I'm so sorry, baby! Please take me back! Yessssss, my precious.....
WHATCHUUUU STARIN' AT?!
6. I have no idea what happened during #5.
7. 'Mambo Number Five' is now stuck in my head.
8. I need a working cell phone more than I need sleep.
9. NEW SEASON OF DOCTOR WHOOOOOOOO!!
10. It's 3:14 a.m. I won't be in bed for a few hours. Yes, I'm fucked.
11. America--FUCK YEAH!
12. The world is more positive when you're Scott Stapp. Yeah.
13. Damn it, I meant for this blog to be meaningful.
14. A little bit of Monica in my life; a little bit of Erica by my side....
15. Today, while eating shells&cheese, I wondered what I would do if I found a mouse foot in my food. I am now afraid of shells&cheese.
16. Siamese cats are the shit.
17. Speaking of Siamese shit and cats, I went to the circus not too long ago. It was awesome.
18. You're drunk.
19. Fuck this blog. I'm tired.
Monday, January 25, 2010
Women Without Make-Up
I've heard a million times the myth that no woman is attractive without make-up. I even have to admit that I don't like anyone seeing me unless I'm fully done-up, for fear that I will repulse other human beings. I can't understand how I got this way, though, since I lived with only my dad for the majority of my life. He certainly didn't wear make-up, and never cared whether or not I brushed my teeth, let alone put make-up on.
I do believe that it was the grocery stores of my youth that turned me into the self-conscious monster I am now. Yes, the grocery stores. For it is here that, while waiting for the cashier to take an hour to ring up the person in front of me with five items, I had to stand and look at the tabloid covers for something to do. Every issue screamed at me, "ZOMG, LOOK AT DEEZ FAMIS PPL WIF NO MAKE-UPZZZ! :O :O :O" I couldn't care less whether or not all of these famous women are wearing their clown masks, but I couldn't resist looking.
I never could look at such pictures and see what the magazines say. I don't see a woman who should put make-up on because, without it, she looks worn and haggard. I don't see bad skin, wrinkles, freckles, puffy eyes, or whatever these women are trying to hide.
I see real women. I see someone who isn't a plastic mold of a million other women in Hollywood. I see someone who, for once, isn't hiding from the entire world. I certainly do not see any ugliness in these photos.
But more importantly, what I see is the magazine telling me that, as a person who doesn't wear make up 24/7, I look disgusting, repulsive, and lizard-like. I'm reminded that unless I'm looking my absolute Hollywood best, I should crawl back into my dark hole and better prepare myself. I'm reminded that my norm just isn't good enough. And that tears me apart.
So, with that, three cheers for real beauty, and a big middle finger to the grocery store!
I do believe that it was the grocery stores of my youth that turned me into the self-conscious monster I am now. Yes, the grocery stores. For it is here that, while waiting for the cashier to take an hour to ring up the person in front of me with five items, I had to stand and look at the tabloid covers for something to do. Every issue screamed at me, "ZOMG, LOOK AT DEEZ FAMIS PPL WIF NO MAKE-UPZZZ! :O :O :O" I couldn't care less whether or not all of these famous women are wearing their clown masks, but I couldn't resist looking.
I never could look at such pictures and see what the magazines say. I don't see a woman who should put make-up on because, without it, she looks worn and haggard. I don't see bad skin, wrinkles, freckles, puffy eyes, or whatever these women are trying to hide.
I see real women. I see someone who isn't a plastic mold of a million other women in Hollywood. I see someone who, for once, isn't hiding from the entire world. I certainly do not see any ugliness in these photos.
But more importantly, what I see is the magazine telling me that, as a person who doesn't wear make up 24/7, I look disgusting, repulsive, and lizard-like. I'm reminded that unless I'm looking my absolute Hollywood best, I should crawl back into my dark hole and better prepare myself. I'm reminded that my norm just isn't good enough. And that tears me apart.
So, with that, three cheers for real beauty, and a big middle finger to the grocery store!
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